Observation

I have an assignment from my Taoist teacher to observe people, watching how they behave with as little judgment as I can manage. 

Observing people without judgment is extraordinarily difficult.  I am programmed to see something and then assign it a label so that I can dismiss it from my mind and move on to "more interesting" stuff.  Example:  I ride an elevator to the 18th floor of a high-rise building every day and, as a result, have an opportunity to observe a lot of different people. 

Previously, I found it easy to deal with this situation since I had my ready made labels to use.  The fellow in the business suit with the Blackberry, thumb typing away and scrolling ceaselessly through messages was Mr. Corporate Ladder Climber.  Dismiss.  The older woman with too much perfume on, unnaturally colored hair and a low cut top was Ms. Trying to Look Young (and failing miserably).  Dismiss.  The young lady with the harried look and a stain not quite scrubbed off the front of her blouse was Ms. Young Mother.  Dismiss.  And so on. 

Trying, now, not to use those labels, I have discovered how many of them I have.  I carry around a regular filing cabinet in my head, with labels ready made to slap on almost every situation and file smugly away.  Looking at these same people without judgment though, I am discovering that I actually pick up more about who they might really be. 

Mr. Corporate Ladder Climber could be scrolling ceaselessly through his messages looking for an invite from a friend for a relaxing dinner that evening.

Ms. Trying to Look Young may have just met a man who makes her feel really young and desirable for the first time in years.

Ms. Young Mother could just as easily be an animal rescue worker as have a spitting up child at home.

I am finding that working this exercise makes me more present because I am actually paying attention to the people around me instead of filing them away.  Tomorrow I will talk a little bit about my reactions to turning the observation on myself.